Monday, December 07, 2009

Umm, it's a music video. That's all I have to say about that.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Finally, some good news.

Friday, November 06, 2009

Some say older people are the worst drivers. Others, women. Still others say it's Asians.

In completely unrelated news, a 68-year-old South Korean woman has passed the written portion of the driving test after only 950 attempts.

Now she just has to pass the practical. At this rate, she could be on the road by the time she's 72!
In Soviet Russia, alcohol abuses you!

Thursday, October 22, 2009

On the day that, in the words of BBC News, Microsoft "unleashed" WIndows 7, Japan, as always, can be relied upon to bring the whiskey-tango-foxtrot.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Hey now
Where you going with that load of nothing in your hand
I said, hey now
All through this green and pleasant land.

I'm going down to Liverpool to do nothing
Don't give a flying fuck?  Well then this won't help with all of your holiday gift-giving needs.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Don't tell Lex Luthor, but I think they've found Superman's fortress of (really hot) solitude.

Friday, September 04, 2009

Old skool reprobates stuff

Funny Japanese iPhone related product. Not sure what it is, not sure I care but the website asks "What's i-fukkin?" Dunno, what's u-fukkin?

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Boycott Scotland

If you object to the release of the Lockerbie bomber by the Scottish, why not consider boycotting Scotland?

Internet DNA

Find out how the world sees YOU. Or at least everyone with your name.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Give 'em the finger

Shake hands with your future.

I, for one, welcome our high-speed robot overlords.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Talking out of your ass: bad.

Winking out of your ass: WTF, mate.

(I guess the models with the nice asses looked at this and thought: Are you f'ing kidding me?)

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Jackass at work stealing your lunch from the fridge again?

You must not be using the right kind of sangwidge bag.
Instant drive-by shooting, just add stupid.

Wednesday, August 05, 2009

Do you have an officially certified birth certificate? No? Do you want one? One that gives you the panache and high-class status of being born in Africa? Well, now you can have one for the low, low price of free! Yes, you read that right. Free!

Just follow your mouse and you, too, can have a Kenyan birth certificate as authentic as Barack Obama's!!

No obligation. No sales rep will call. Operators are standing by. Click now!

Friday, July 31, 2009

No doubt you've seen that viral video of what's supposed to be the best wedding intro ever?

Wonder how it ends? Wonder no more.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Some people are taking the idea of a nice relaxing drink very seriously indeed.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Smoking kills (your wallet)

"Yeah, can I get some cash back if I charge these smokes? Ok, cool. How much you got in the drawer?"

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

So if it neither prevents nor cures swine flu, but may actually help to spread it, how is it distinguishable from, say, ordinary tap water?

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

I'm not sure if this is the coolest thing I've ever seen or the scariest. Calling skynet. Skynet are you there?

Oh wait - it's on Fox"News". So it's clearly fair(read: distorted) and balanced (read: bullshit).

Carry on.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Ever wonder if it's your time to go?

Not this guy. Dude, go play the lottery. NOW.

Thursday, July 02, 2009

This is one of my new favorite sites.

Ken, you got any handywork to contribute?

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Playin' large.

Anyone up for a life-sized version of Operation?

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Bacon Hottie

Not sure why all my posts are meat-related these days, but there you go. Anyway - Girl in a Meat Dress

Boom!

Add one part youtube, one part mythbusters and 2 parts juvenile schadenfreude and you too can have action beverages (no, not those stupid energy drinks) at your next party.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Business cards made of MEAT. That is all.

Monday, April 06, 2009

Bacon

Baconbaconbaconbaaaaccoooonnnn. Bacon. Just add bacon.

Friday, March 27, 2009


Because many of the things I'm about to say regarding Reprobates have already been beaten into the ground, I will try to keep this letter short. For starters, I recently overheard a couple of unbalanced snobs say that homophobic bloodsuckers have dramatically lower incidences of cancer, heart attacks, heart disease, and many other illnesses than the rest of us. Here, again, we encounter the blurred thinking that is characteristic of this Reprobates-induced era of slogans and propaganda. The only way that we can fight Reprobates, the only way we can beat it, is to begin the debate about its grievances. To a lesser degree and on a smaller scale, I fully intend to reveal the constant tension between centripetal and centrifugal forces of dialogized heteroglossia resulting from its fibs. That's the path that I have chosen. It's doubtlessly not an easy path but then again, I call upon Reprobates to stop its oppression, lies, immorality, and debauchery. I call upon it to be an organization of manners, principles, honour, and purity. And finally, I call upon it to forgo its desire to sweep its peccadillos under the rug.

In a Reprobates-led society, people who keep our priorities in check will be suppressed, vilified, hated, imprisoned, exiled, and killed. Why is that relevant to this letter? Because all Reprobates really wants is to hang onto the perks it's getting from the system. That's all it really cares about. Many of Reprobates's morals have been criticized for being slanted in favor of a particular stance. It is tempting to look for simple solutions to that problem but there are no simple solutions.

I have one itsy-bitsy problem with Reprobates's philosophies. Videlicet, they stand in the way of progress. And that's saying nothing about how you might say, "Social stability and family unity are two things that mad sad sacks have no concern for." Fine, I agree. But if you were to try to tell its acolytes that anyone who questions its warped view of the world is a threat to its tottering sense of reality, they'd close their eyes and put their hands over their ears. They are, as the psychologists say, in denial. They don't want to hear that Reprobates has remarked that it should be a given a direct pipeline to the National Treasury. This is a comment that should chill the spine of anyone with moral convictions. To make sure you understand I'll spell it out for you. For starters, if you look back over some of my older letters, you'll see that I predicted that Reprobates would feed us ever-larger doses of its lies and crackpot assumptions. And, as I predicted, it did. But you know, that was not a difficult prediction to make. Anyone who has bothered to learn even a little about Reprobates could have made the same prediction. Reprobates has had it easy all its life. There, my ranting is finished.


Behold, the Complaint-O-Matic!

Friday, February 27, 2009

Ryanair is thinking of charging its passengers to use the toilets while in flight. What could possibly go wrong?

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Meet my new shordurpersav: Tucker Max.

Thanks again, Jeff!
Duct tape - now available in nuclear grade!

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Bacon is over as an Internet meme, the pirateninjazombies craze is officially "tired" - how are hipsters and /b/-tards alike going to get their yuks on next?

My prediction: sumo wrestlers. Thanks, Jeff!

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

A møøse ønce bit my sister ...

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

$0.002 = ¢ 0.002 "if you look at them on paper-wise"

The braintrust at Verizon talking cash cash money.

Saturday, January 31, 2009

Star Trek: The Next Next Generation - Episodes 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13

Thursday, January 29, 2009

HI THERE BILLY MAYS HERE FOR THIS GREEN & WHITE EPOXY PUTTY SHIT

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Farewell, George!

GBSF. That is all.

Michelle and Barack do what together now?

Hey, I don't care what you do in private but it seems odd to broadcast it on the news ... especially on Fox "News" ... in Detroit ... on live TV.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Ben & Jerry create "Yes Pecan!" ice cream flavor for Obama. For George W. they created ...

Friday, January 09, 2009

Saturday, January 03, 2009

Awesome collection of really useful Unix admin scripts - link.

Friday, January 02, 2009

Mike Rowe, star of Discovery's Dirty Jobs, used to hawk all kinds of things on QVC.

Including, it seems, the best-named product EVAR.