Wednesday, October 31, 2001

Most spam that you get with "interesting" subjects tend to lead to some type of porn site. When I got one recently with the subject "Attention Hose Draggers", this is the LAST thing I expected:

Why spend all your spare time dragging that hose around your yard?
Call TLC today at l-888-PICK TLC

We will be able to have a sales representative out this week to give you a
quote on an automatic lawn sprinkler system.

Not getting enough different slants on the "current situation"? Try these on for size: Israeli-sourced intelligence news/analysis, US-sourced intelligence news/analysis, or, err, InstaPundit. I can't say, of course, where these links came from. Thanks, John B.
It's a shitty job, but someone's got to do it. A new spin on going postal.
It's dark and very very cold in Finland, so I suspect the Finns spend a lot of time indoors with not much to do. I guess a prime number shitting bear is the sort of thing you'd expect to occur to them over the long winter months.

Monday, October 29, 2001

Opt out of credit card and insurance offers?
If you read this article out loud, record it (mp3, wav, audio cassette, whatever) and then play it backwards, its hidden message appears to be "sell ORCL." Of course, if you were a "chartist," you would have already known this just by reading your horoscope. WTF?
A picture paints a thousand words? These guys have turned it into a game. Anyone remember the old games of tennis and whack-a-mole played out in ASCII art on USENET?

Friday, October 26, 2001

Thursday, October 25, 2001

I could spend hours on this site. Just in the last hour, I learned about C and black boxes. Gotta throw this in, otherwise my post surely will not pass the censors.
Never knew why I would ever want to install printer drivers anyway.
You may have thought the Ham(p)ster Dance was the ultimate in useless crap, but at least the Ham(p)ster Dance">Ham(p)ster Dance has an annoying tune that gets stuck in your head that can't be cleared by booze, hookers, boozed-up hookers, or hooked-up boozers. Here, then, is something much more useless:: Momo.
Following Shaun's announcement, I'm pleased to announced that the "Are we getting our money's worth?" award this month goes to Heimatgesichertsheitamtoberstandardtenfuehrer ... err, sorry, Homeland Security Office chief Tom ("Cheese") Ridge who is quoted by CNN as saying: "It is clear that the terrorists intended to use this anthrax as a weapon."

I am very glad he has clarified this for us - I had been vacillating for days (aside - does one need Vaseline in order to vacillate properly? Or at least without friction burns?) over whether the terrorists intended the anthrax as a peace offering, or as an apology. After all, you never know with terrorists.

Now, after a couple of weeks of intensive head-scratching, Tom ("Hergest") Ridge has at last cleared things up. Thanks, Tom. Good job.
I'd love see these guys be a supporter of NPR one day. Brought to you by who!??
Don't we all hate dead gerbils up our behinds?
The "Not looking so smart now" award this month is shared between the Bush and Clinton administrations. Back in July, the US scuppered an international effort to enforce the 1972 Biological Weapons Convention, based on findings by the Clinton administration that the protocol "would put national security and confidential business information at risk."

Wednesday, October 24, 2001

Spot the odd one out:


Two of these are Pokemon, one of them is a US Navy Rear Admiral. You make the call.
This just in: Anthrax only sent to important people. Not you.
Looking for a great source of unsubstantiated rumors about top secret internment camps dotted around the US? Tales of hypersonic research aircraft over the Nevada Desert? Blather about the Omega Agency and the orders it issues that come from "above the President"? Then look no further than AboveTopSecret. Just beware, though, that the NSA will be watching you ...
Jane Doe found in McDonalds restroom.
Feeling depressed, anxious, or confused in the wake of all that we see every day on the news? Maybe you should BuySexToysNow.

Friday, October 19, 2001

Trial of the 21st century?

Thursday, October 18, 2001

Mad props to Sergio for getting his war on.

Wednesday, October 17, 2001

Yep - the deployment of not one but two (count 'em folks) Spectre gunships to turn the Taliban into dog chow explains to me why the most promising new name for the territory under attack is "Half-gone-istan".

The choice of the nickname "Spectre" for the AC-130 is, to me, an intriguing choice. I can imagine few things less "spectral" than a 62-ton, 16,000 horsepower transport plane raining down withering firepower while turning lazy circles in the sky. I can think of few more concrete demonstrations of military might and resolve. Indeed, one of the reasons they're using these beasts during broad daylight is: because they can. If indeed it's true what they say, that there are many Taliban/al-Qaeda members who cherish the thought of death as much as Americans cherish life, then this thing is here to help them achieve that goal. Anyone else with a rather, say, better functioning sense of self-preservation (hell, if we had the time, I'd be happy to wait for evolution to run its course with these geniuses) should have ample reason, if not time, to rethink that position.

Let's face it, whether you're chewed up by 7.62mm bullets being sprayed at you by the pair of incongruously-named "mini-guns" (the same 6-barrel Gatling gun things you saw being supposedly used in "Predator" - yes, those mini-guns), ripped in two by the 20mm cannons, obliterated by the 40mm Bofors cannon, or just plain aerosolized by the 105mm Howitzer, you've probably eaten your latest kebab, and burned your last American flag.

And finally ... a survivalist writer and friend of mine (who has recently been commissioned by that most urbane of the highbrow journals, "Hustler", to write a "think piece" on surviving a terrorist attack) passed on the following interesting tidbit last night: by his calculations, a one megaton nuclear airburst strike, detonated at a height of 10,000 feet agl would be sufficient to ignite every turban within a seven mile radius. He offers no particular context or rationale for having performed this calculation, just kinda thought it was interesting.

Tuesday, October 16, 2001

Thanks to Ken for discovering this gem. The Spectre has been called into battle in Afghanistan. Let's face it folks this amazing piece of military hardware just kicks fuckin' ass!

Monday, October 15, 2001

Hmmm. Who says all the best cereals are for kids? Also, I think I've met a few of these people before?
This is just got old fashion terrifying. The sound you hear is the sound of your privacy being sucked up by the giant corporate/government vacuum cleaner.

Sunday, October 14, 2001

Now, we'll all seen the amazing stick figure martial arts demonstration as rendered in Flash. Let's kick it up a level by putting each and every one of us in control of those kung-fu moves. Better yet, let's add Bruce Lee to the mix.

Friday, October 12, 2001

Serge (hi, Serge!) has alerted me to this little treasure trove of mirth & jollity. Thanks, Serge.
Is it possible to be so nonsensical you actually start making sense?

Tuesday, October 09, 2001

Warning! Friends don't let friends drink and do, well ... lots of things. Thanks, Mike.

Monday, October 08, 2001

"First and foremost, Tromix believes that a firearm or related product should entertain its user, and in the event such a refined product such as ours should stand out in the fields of hunting, self defense, home offense, or other such activities, so be it. Hence, Tromix cares not if it fits a specific application, as long as it is fun and entertaining to the user. We feel excessive noise, blast, recoil and a good fireball are a prerequisite to an invigorating shooting experience."
Nice discussion (and selection of photos) of pimp guns on ...

Friday, October 05, 2001

Ever wonder why the shower curtain seems to attack you in the morning?

Thursday, October 04, 2001

Another disheartening article about the CIA's continuing failure to measure up to the threat and the challenge it and, oh, the rest of us, are now facing from the Bin Man.

I had somehow managed to conflate in my mind this article and the one Shaun posted when talking with Mr Sandrowitz the other day, to the great confusion of us both.

However, I am now taking my medication again, the fog has lifted, and all is now clear.

By the way - the article I keep exhorting everyone to read is in the on-line edition of The New Yorker, a too-too-sophisticated magazine for and by those living closest to the North-East's largest ongoing urban renewal project. For some reason best known to themselves, and clearly far beyond the grasp of those of us not blessed with the good fortune to live in the city of overpriced shoe-box apartments, rude people and terrorist-demolished skyscrapers, the site has chosen to put the article on a page whose URL will one day change, as it is one of those "monthly spot" links. So - enough vitriol about New York and New Yorker magazine. It's a good piece - good enough to make everyone feel really good about themselves, and really bad about the CIA - so go read it while the URL is valid and not pointing to, say, an article about why the Hamptons will be so fabulous this fall, or where the best blintzes are to be found on the Upper East Side.

Monday, October 01, 2001

Forget earning Membership Rewards or United Frequent Flyer miles -- Check out PC Booty Call -- "a full service auction house for escorts, that offers you beautiful girls available through a consistent, reliable, and timely, fantasy service that you can bid on." It pays to use it, becuase you can "... earn Pimp Points towards a free appointment the more you use our service."
An interesting article on how ill-prepared the US's intelligence agencies are to combat Usama Bin Laden. This was written before September 11th, and contains such gems from operatives as "Operations that include diarrhea as a way of life don't happen."

Having seen how much curry some ex-UK special forces operatives can consume, I can only assume this isn't a problem for British intelligence. To quote one: "My arse'll be like the back end of the batmobile tomorrow."