Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Daniel Dennett's reivew of Intelligent Design

Daniel Dennett has always been a favorite writer of mine. He put together a great review of lack of there-ness in the Intelligent Design argument.

Crack in my windshield

Driving down the 270 in Maryland, minding my own business, when all of a sudden, there's a crack in my winshield!








You heard it here first:

Q) Which pop group devastated New Orleans?

A) Katrina and the Waves

Q) And what song will they be covering next?

A) When The Levee Breaks
Post-modern advertising (Thanks, Nick!)

Monday, August 29, 2005

Places Reprobates live

This is a great list of Reprobate-friendly towns to live in... and it is brought to you by Scunthorpe.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Remember the phoenix personal submarine? Nice, but no good without an evil underwater lair. Now, the sub is $78m, the lair is $2.5m - I have about £20 and change in my wallet. Who's in? Muahaahahahahaaaa!

Monday, August 22, 2005

Great inline ad

Read the article - then look at what you can buy on the same topic..

Thursday, August 18, 2005

Chicks dig candles. Guys dig auto racing. So how do you sell candles to guys?

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Complete this sentence using one of the word pairs listed below:

"Squeezing X into the Y is a somewhat messy job"

a) X = jam, Y = donuts
b) X = Vetustodermis, Y = mollusca
c) X = fake cum, Y = porn star's cunt

Correct answer here.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

The scene: a coffeeshop in Amsterdam, summer of 2003
Bob McDonald: Duuuude, this is some awesome Noorder Licht
Friend 1: Whoa, no shit
Friend 2: I'm soooo waaaaasted. Let's get some ice cream!
(They get ice cream)
Bob: Hey! Hey! Look at the crazy sticks these ice creams came on! I've got a great idea!
Friends 1 and 2: Yeah?
Bob: Let's build something with them!
This just in - the rapper formerly known as Sean Combs to join aging Liverpool comic Ken Dodd's troop of comedy midgets.

This soon-to-be in - the rapper formerly known as Diddy to change his name one final time, dropping the initial "D" and the terminal "dy", and appending the letters "iot".

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Variously billed as "one of my favorite internet videos of all time" and "the greatest video in the history of the internet", this movie is indeed, pretty frickin' awesome. Yeee-haw!

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Ladies and gentlem... who am I kidding? You're all reprobates. That's why you're here. Anyway, we have our first piece of comment spam - look at the comments for Monday's entry on Pentaho. However, when you are looking at the comments, kindly overlook the fact that I misspelled shit.

Chris' and my theory is that someone has compiled an index of all Blogger-hosted sites with an Atom or RSS feed, aggregated those feeds and put a bot on the trail of certain keywords. Scum-sucking weasels.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

I flew on this very helicopter, June 13th, 2004. Probably won't be doing that again any time soon. Picture goodness here (that's it on the pad in Tallinn).

Monday, August 08, 2005

A couple of weeks back, I commented on the unfortunate qualities of the name Siliquent. This week, I bring you an even more bafflingly bad name - Pentaho. What is that exactly? A five-sided hooker? A quintet of prostitutes? Or just the kind of woman who'll only go down on a boat powered by Volvo marine engines?

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Idiotwatch: Kate Hudson, bubbleheaded actress and daughter of arch-bimbo Goldie Hawn, recently blathered the following piece of nonsense -

"Almost Famous" actress Kate Hudson is making a habit of splashing water over herself to ward off bad Hollywood vibes. Hudson, 26, is so scared of attracting bad karma that she wears crystals to protect herself, according to World Entertainment News Network.

"When I'm around people who have bad energy," she says, "I usually carry some water and I just kind of, like, put it on myself. It's not like a holy water, just something to cleanse myself if someone's really negative. And I carry around crystals, too. I feel it's important to protect yourself."


Hmm. I'm thinking she could be persuaded that other, aah, liquids would be equally beneficial. Can anyone say bukkake? Yeah, I thought so.
Question: would a 14-year-old understand why this is funny? And if they did, would they still buy Nacho Cheesier® Dorito™-brand corn snacks? And wash them down with AMP® Mountain Dew™-brand soda?

"violent, confrontive prayer"

That little line comes from the linked article in Harper's on the New Life Church. Specifically, Pastor Ted is referring to how Christians can reclaim the cities of America... through "violent, confrontive prayer." I can't help but think that is thinly veiled code for racial/ethnic/religious-based ass-whoopings. This is in the same vein as "I'm gonna load up this here gun and meet that new non-Christian immigrant family's mailbox with violent, confrontive prayer, and possibly a burning cross as well."

The author describes the dining habits of the flock of New Life in Colorado Springs with the following:
It is not so much the large populations, with their uneasy mix of sinner and saved, that make Christian conservatives leery of urban areas. Even downtown Colorado Springs, presumably as godly as any big town in America, struck the New Lifers I met as unclean. Whenever I asked where to eat, they would warn me away from downtown’s neat little grid of cafes and ethnic joints. Stick to Academy, they’d tell me, referring to the vein of superstores and prepackaged eateries —P. F. Chang’s, California Pizza Kitchen, et al. —that bypasses the city. Downtown, they said, is “confusing.”


Ah, yes... confusing. Yeah, it's tough having choices. Like what to eat, or what to wear, or whom to vote for. It's hard having those tough tough choices. I guess it's best to cede control and let someone else tell you what to do. It's so much less confusing.

Well, speaking as one of those confused City dwellers, I say, stick to the exurbs, it's safer for you there. And when you do come to my town for some religious themed vacation, I'll be sure to give you excellent direction to food and entertainment.

(And now thanks to the wonder of Google the New Life Church, us Reprobates, Ben's Chili Bowl, and a directory of DC"s strip clubs are all linked together. I can't wait to see what ads we all have in common.)

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

There seems to be a definite theme going here - by complete coincidence, a friend (hi, Jeremy!) sent me a video clip today that illustrates a corollary to yesterday's post.

Here's the setup: "Imagine this... You just came to Texas Tech University as a freshman... You get the opportunity to make it big time as the football team's 'BELL RINGER' during their games... Your whole family, all of your friends, and about 10-15 million ESPN viewers will see you on a Saturday telecast ringing the team's bell.... "

Video goodness here.

Monday, August 01, 2005

Best. Sports headline. Evar.