Sometimes the stories just write themselves: Go to Argos' web site, and search on the word "chav".

Followup: The result of the above search is the display of some goldie lookin' chains; in fact, since the first item is priced at a thousand quid, and is still only 9 carat, I'd guess it's more than just goldie-lookin'. Anyway, this now enables me to talk about the band Goldie Lookin' Chain, the best white suburban rappers stuck in a 1983 time warp ever to come out of South Wales. I just got their Greatest Hits, and, man, they are funny as shit.