I had occasion today to illustrate to Ian whence cometh an expression I like to use with abandon - the expression being "go fuck yourself with a cream cheese dildo" - and when I found a copy of the item that I first read as a Unix fortune(6) during my days at UKC, I decided it was such a classic (and because I only found a single, sole copy of it on the Web), that I would post the link. And so here it is. Enjoy.